


Jealousy and other small things

by greypaper



Category: B.A.P
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Oneshot, daejae - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-25
Updated: 2016-06-25
Packaged: 2018-07-18 04:48:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7300225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greypaper/pseuds/greypaper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daehyun had thought that the video shoot with Apink would be fun but oh, how wrong the young man had been. "Why is she always with Youngjae?" "He should be sitting next to me." "Youngjae should pay attention to me." "Youngjae looks incredibly cute in school clothes." "Wait, what?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jealousy and other small things

His cocky grin vanished as the singer entered the changing room and Daehyun immediately tugged at the horrible light pink suit jacket. Who on earth had decided for him to wear this, okay he knew this video was supposed to be cute and all but he personally thought he looked ridiculous. It didn't even look cute and all though, as it probably was supposed to. So yeah, there he was, alone in one of their groups changing rooms in his pink suit, sulking and pouting to himself as he took out his phone just to do anything.

"God, why am I so pissed." The young man groaned, not able to concentrate on Instagram or anything else that was being displayed on his phone and he hastily put it back in his bag.

He was tired, he told himself, exhausted from the acting and playing nice, exhausted from people looking at Youngjae as if he was the most special and precious person in the entire building and Daehyun grumpily had to admit that he thought the same.

His friend looked good in his clothes, the school outfit clung to his body nicely and his black hair was framing his slimmed down face perfectly, Daehyun nearly couldn't, no, didn't want to tear his gaze away and it annoyed him to no end. He had known Youngjae for quite some time now, they were friends right from the beginning but something was odd seeing him in those clothes and Daehyun could not describe it at all. It was as if he was seeing a younger Youngjae, a high schooler who was being the typical boy with his small crush on a girl who always took the same bus as he did. And Daehyun really didn't know but he couldn't stand seeing Youngjae all happy and smiley around those girls, his stupidly cute dimples were on display way too often and Daehyun thought that until this day he had been the only one those dimples were shown to but he had been proven wrong, obviously.

Youngjaes many smiles had been for the crew and those girls today, occasionally Junhong because the youngest was acting all shy out of unknown reasons (as if!). And it bothered the singer because Youngjae was supposed to crack stupid jokes with him and pout, displaying his cute pink lips after Daehyun was finally satisfied and stopped joking around. Yet none of it had happened up until now and it was nearing noon, them being at the set since six in the morning not helping at all. Daehyun was deprived, Youngjae deprived he thought but quickly shook his head and leaned against the wall for support, dreadfully waiting that the filming director would call his name and get him out to film the dance scene with all of them.

Even the dance was so overly goofy that at some point Daehyun wished himself to time travel back to their debut music video making, even if that meant he'd have to have this ridiculous blond shock of hair again, not that his hair wasn't blond right now but it looked way better, sort of washed out and not as yellow anymore. Still, it would be better than to make a fool out of himself, not in front of those girls because hell, they were nice and all, he couldn't even find the time to be embarrassed in front of them. 

He had liked the dance, if someone were to ask about the choreography before the actual video shooting he would've said that it was cute, probably only because the way Youngjae had looked in the oversized shirt bouncing happily around in their practice room at their company had made his heart melt. Of course he would never admit that, he would never say out loud that Youngjaes collarbones had peeked from beneath the baby blue cotton fabric and he immediately noticed. He would never say out loud that the younger boys black shock of hair had been all ruffled up because it was early in the morning and Youngjae had slept a little bit too long, rushing over to the dance studio and his hair was tousled from the wind which made Daehyun want to run through the soft strands and play with them. He would never say out loud that his heart had skipped a beat upon seeing Youngjae arrive, a little bit out of breath but as stunning looking as ever. He would never say out loud that he had always thought the younger ones lips looked very kissable but he was so afraid to get even close to them with his own lips.

No. He did not have a ridiculous crush on his younger band member. And no, he definitely was not jealous at all. He was also not pouting as he sat in the changing room, playing with the hem of the white cotton dress shirt which had a red bow tie neatly gracing its collar.

Stupid Youngjae.

Stupid Music Video.

Stupid girls.

Daehyun didn't even feel the slightest bit of guilt forming in his chest as he was grumbling over all the people the younger had given his attention to today. Youngjae was his best friend, the only person that could bring the singer to bend over laughing until he was hitting the people around him was Daehyun. The only person that the younger was a hundred percent comfortable talking about his problems was Daehyun. Not anyone else and the Busan boy was bound to keep it this exact way.

 

"Daehyun?" A deep voice echoed in the hallway from outside, emitting an annoyed groan from the singer and seconds later the door was pushed open and Yongguk came in. "There you are, and Himchan said you ran away." The rapper chuckled and a small grin formed on his lips.

"Why would I run away." Daehyun asked, forcing himself to smile at his leader to hide his annoyance that was quickly seething inside of him, He had only needed a few more minutes to calm down, Jesus Christ.

"Dunno but anyway, you need to join us, we're going to film on the campus outside." Yongguk stated and leaned onto the door, biding for Daehyun to move.

"Do I really need to?" The younger of the two groaned, letting his head roll back.

"This is your job, yes, you really need to Daehyun." Yongguk replied, eyes rolling a the behavior of his dongsaeng. "Are the girls not giving you enough attention or why are you this grumpy today?" The rapper questioned, crossing his arms in front of his chest and he tried to hide the amusement.

"Yeah, as if that would make me, Jung Daehyun, falter in any way." Daehyun snorted, knowing he had to leave the changing room but he wanted to withdraw his time in there for just the slightest bit.

"Then why are you behaving like that, and don't tell me you're tired or some shit." The older one said, his tone serious but he might have guessed why Daehyun was acting the way he was.

"I just thought this would be more fun." The singer mentioned, unable to hold eye contact as if the other would see right through his lie.

"More fun, yeah, sure. You're quite the bad liar." Yongguk mocked, earning a glare from Daehyun. 

"Well I'm definitely not enjoying this shoot okay?" Daehyun uttered, honestly all he wanted to do was go home but that was, sadly, out of question. 

"And why is that?" 

"Are we really having this talk right now, I thought we have to go outside." Daehyun mumbled, trying to hold back the rush of heat that was surging to his cheeks. 

"Yes, we are having this talk, the others can wait." Yongguk claimed, stepping into the room and closing the door behind him. "What's wrong, you know I'm trustworthy. I'm not going to gossip about it to Himchan." 

"Himchan would do that." Daehyun snorted, as lovely as Himchan hyung was the man was terrible at keeping his mouth shut. 

"Yeah. So tell me, what's bothering you?" Yongguk urged, sitting next to Daehyun on the couch. 

"You swear you're not going to talk about it to anyone?" Daehyun asked, insecurity clearly audible in his voice.

"I swear." The older replied quickly, wanting to know what was so utterly important to Daehyun. 

"And you're not going to judge me because if you-"

"Daehyun, I won't come on, have a little trust in me." The rapper wasn't hurt but now maybe a little afraid to hear his group member talk. He had thought that Daehyun was annoyed because the member of the girl group had been paying attention to Himchan and Youngjae only, occasionally they cooed over how cute Junhong was. But Daehyun didn't seem to worry about that at all, well at least not in the way the older thought it affected him. 

"Don't interrupt me because this is going to be very embarrassing. I have never talked about this to anyone." Daehyun stated, voice serious and a little bit shaky because holy shit I'm going to say this out loud, this is actually how I feel. Yongguk only nodded, preparing himself mentally for what was about to come.

"It's hard to explain, I've always, kind of tried to push these thoughts aside because they're so wrong and I feel bad about it but- I just can't stop thinking about... it. It's about," Daehyun paused, looking up to the door to see if someone was about to interrupt them but everything was silent in the hallway and his glance dropped back to his lap. "Youngjae." Daehyun breathed out, afraid to look at the older next to him. "I think that I like him and, it's driving me completely crazy because he's a boy but every time I look at him it feels like my heart is clenching and it skips so many beats and I can feel it hammering inside my chest and I worry if Youngjae can hear it and if he'll laugh at me. And I'm going to stop right here because I could go on and on about how beautiful I think he is."

Silence quickly settled in between the two of them, Daehyun scared of the reaction he would get from Yongguk and the latter a little bit shocked but not necessarily in a bad way.

"If you're expecting me to scream at you then you can wait forever, I'm not mad or anything." The older said calmly, trying to assure Daehyun that it was alright. "I tolerate these things, I thought you knew."

"I know. I was just- scared." Daehyun answered, head hung low in embarrassment as his cheeks were tinted a light pink.

"You know what we're going to do today? Well, not we but you." Yongguk asked, smiling when the younger looked up with a questioning glance. "You are going to confess because from what I've seen Youngjae doesn't hate you, he likes you quite a lot actually so go and find out how much he likes you."

"I'M NOT GOING TO DO THIS." Daehyun yelled, standing up to hide his flaming red face which only lead the other to laugh heartily.

"You totally are or I'll hide the keys to your car." The older said, chuckling lightly, it kind of sounded ridiculous because it rhymed.

"You can not force me to do this, he doesn't even like me. Do you have eyes Yongguk hyung, he's been flirting with Eunji the entire day there is no chance at all that he likes me. Why on earth would he like me?" Daehyun rambled, frustrated by just thinking about having to confront the younger.

"He has not been flirting with her, your jealousy is taking over boy." Yongguk said calmly, raising from his seat on the couch and he looked down at the younger. "But we should go now, seriously. Think about it."  
Yongguk left with those words and Daehyun felt sort of betrayed. He thought he would get a life changing speech from the older but now he was stuck with Yongguks stupid words inside his head. Because he definitely couldn't talk to Youngjae about this, not now, not later, not this week. Never.

Jung Daehyun, you're going to end up alone with seven dogs.

Daehyun sighed, he tried to get himself together whilst putting his cold palms over his red cheeks. He could actually survive this day if he didn't have to watch the scene were Youngjae was in the bus, clearly trying to woo Eunji. He'll probably hide back here again, just to save his heart from bursting into flames as jealousy radiates through his body. The singer never would have thought that he himself is one of the jealous types and yet he couldn't even stand watching the younger vocalist talk to any of the girl group members. It was irritating, he sort of knew that he liked Youngjae more than the other members but always tried to think it was because they were pretty close in age. It never occurred to him that there was anything more behind his behavior, trying to persuade himself that the longing glances meant nothing at all, that he urge to touch and protect the younger was simply out of platonic love. Oh how pathetic he was, trying to convince himself that he would not like to kiss those sweet, pouty lips.

His heart was beating out of place every time just by thinking about the other and it never really helped much that they always shared rooms. They roomed together in the groups dorm, overseas and one time when they were visiting friends Daehyun had given Youngjae the privilege to sleep on the guest bed whilst he had to get accustomed to the old mattress that was spread on the floor. It hasn't even been that long since that but Daehyun still hadn't faced his feelings yet and the confusion was a steady factor in his being that night. He could hear the other breathing, slow and peaceful and sometimes the younger would make small whimpering noises, leading Daehyun to think if he was having a nightmare and everything inside of him struck the need to climb into the unfamiliar bed next to the other boy, cuddle him close and put him secure into his own arms. Yet he couldn't, because Youngjae is a boy, and for a matter of fact he is a boy too and it was so wrong. He never really got confronted with the subject, his parents never felt the necessity to talk about those people to him. He sort of knew they didn't much like the topic and so he never really brought it up. It wasn't necessary to because he has never been interested in another boy before and up until then, Daehyun thought it would stay that way. Up until Youngjae came, getting to know him with the horrible blond hair that didn't look all that horrible on the youngers head and living together with the boy who held his personality stable was a road trip on its own.

Daehyun loved the way Youngjae would flop down onto the sofa in their dorm after practice, groaning that his bones were hurting and he never wanted to get up again. He loved the way Youngjae would always pull his camera out when they went to a new place and he loved that Youngjae would play around with him, snapping silly pictures of them together, sometimes accompanied by Jongup or Junhong. Daehyun loved watching Youngjae curled up in blankets on his bed on lazy Sundays when they didn't have anything on their schedule, the boy would listen to his music, holding a book in his small, delicate hands whilst bobbing his head a little bit to the beat of a song. He loved how the youngers bangs were growing until they nearly covered his eyes and Daehyun couldn't help but think that Youngjae is beautiful with his cat like eyes that held a gorgeous color of hazelnut brown in between them. It was the small things Daehyun slowly fell for but he wasn't brave enough to call it love, at least not yet.

"Where on earth have you been?" Himchan hissed, eyeing the younger who seemed to ignore him with a simple shrug.

"It's nothing Himchan." Yongguk shifted over, reassuring the singer that everything was fine but Daehyun simply didn't feel that way. He felt dragged down, the second his glance landed on Youngjae who was talking to Eunji because of course he was, what did I expect. Daehyuns heart sank into the pit of his stomach and it felt heavy, as if stones were dragging it deeper and deeper until it broke but hey, it was fine.  
At least he survived the day until Youngjaes and Eunjis scene came on but Daehyun wasn't pathetic, he would not leave the set because of this ridiculous fucking scene taking place. It would be filmed inside the bus and he did not have to be inside there so what were the pros of leaving like a sulking teenage boy.

"I wouldn't have thought you'd be able to smile during this shoot." Yongguks voice ringed in his ears, he turned his head to see the older leaning onto the wall next to him, looking at the filming team just a bit farther away.

"Yeah, at least it'll be over faster that way." Daehyun stated, voice harsh as if it was everyone elses fault.

"Is it Youngjae who's bothering you or that he seems to cope with all those girls all too well." It wasn't much of a question but something to bring Daehyun back to the ground.

"I guess the second option." He sighed, closing his eyes to close out the sunlight.

"I'm sorry I said that." Yongguk apologized but it didn't help the singer much. "But you have to see it like that, either way you tell him sooner or later or you're going to cry your heart out because he's gotten himself a girlfriend."

"I thought we weren't supposed to date." Daehyuns head shot up, pain obviously swimming on the rim of his eyes.

"It's surprisingly not written in our contract. It's kind of a win lose situation for you I guess."

"Well I guess I'm going to lose then." Daehyun mumbled, head lolling back and a frown showing on his face.

"Are you kidding me? You're going to give up just like that?" It wasn't anger slipping through Yongguks voice but disappointment because Daehyun was seriously going to let this small chance slip away that easily?

"I can't tell him hyung, don't you get it?" The singer said, the frustration sipping through his honey vocals.

"Why not? Is it because you're both guys? Because we're idols? Because those things shouldn't hold you back if you like him." Yongguk heaved his body off of the wall, giving the younger a glare. "I know we aren't the closest of friends but I still care about you, at least try, god damn it Daehyun!"

"Why do you even care, it's not like it's affecting you." Daehyun blurted, refusing to look at Yongguk. "Who cares if Youngjae gets a girlfriend or not."

"You know I'm trying to make you realize that you should at least try but if you don't want to." Yongguk turned his head, before he giving his attention to Daehyun again. "Well I tried. Lovers boy's coming, don't embarrass yourself."

Daehyun watched as Yongguk walked away, refusing to take notice of Youngjae who was heading his way and yet he didn't want to ignore the younger.

"Daehyun, there you are." Youngjae whistled, smiling at his best friend when he was standing next to him.

"Yeah, where else should I be?" Daehyun laughed, he hoped the other wouldn't catch on how dry and hoarse his voice sounded. Bad luck I guess.

"What's wrong, you were so quiet today?" The younger asked, cocking his head to the side as he looked at Daehyun with those huge cat like eyes.

"Nothing, it's just been a long day." Daehyun smiled and somehow didn't manage to hide the sadness that was betraying him.

"Why are you lying?" Youngjae pouted and all Daehyun wished to do was kiss it away until the younger was smiling again. All he wished to do was to carry a laughing Youngjae and plant kisses on those cherry like lips.

"It's nothing, really. I was just- having silly worries but Yongguk hyung kind of helped me out." He smiled, honestly giving his best but Youngjae wasn't his best friend for nothing.

"You know you can tell me, right?" The younger tried to convey trust through his warm voice, but it sounded worried and silent.

"This time I just- really can't Youngjae." Daehyun said, sternly looking at the other but his eyes softened when he met Youngjaes.

"Please, I'm here for you." Youngjae tried again, holding the others glance.

"Probably not after this." Daehyun responded, dread filling his entire being.

"What?" Youngjae inquired, shoulders hanging low. "I'm your best friend, I'm always there for you Daehyun."

"Yeah, you're my best friend." Daehyun tried not to sound as if he was mocking the younger but it didn't really express his intentions.

"What do you mean?" Youngjae asked, taking a small, unobtrusively step back.

"I mean," Daehyun hated himself for the anger in his voice, "I don't want you to be my best friend."

"W-what?" The youngers voice was weak, fear and sadness constructing inside of him.

"You heard me, Youngjae." Daehyun hated the fear inside of his heart.

"I did but I don't understand." Youngjae voiced, his voice was trembling the slightest bit. "Daehyun did I do something?"

"You're you, Youngjae, that's enough." Daehyun hates himself.

"I'm-" The younger boy stopped, his eyes were watering as he looked at the man who he thought would always be there with him. "Daehyun..." The whisper sounded even softer with the light breeze that was carrying his voice away. Daehyun snapped.

"God I hate the way your voice sounds so weak, as if I'd just broken your heart even though you don't give a shit. I hate the way you're so fucking composed in front of me when all I do is lose my senses just by looking at you. I hate the way you've been acting today, as if I was nothing but thin air to you. You're hurting me Youngjae." Daehyun didn't sob, nor did a tear escape his eyes but he felt himself falling even harder.

"Daehyun I-"

"Shut up! Just shut the fuck up Youngjae!" Daehyun yelled, threading his fingers in between his hair as frustration took over him. His eyes were convulsively closed and he didn't see Youngjae taking slow, unsure steps forward, not until he felt a pair of arms wrap themselves around his neck. In a matter of seconds Daehyuns arms were around Youngjaes slim waist and his nose was nuzzling into the youngers neck, breathing the the vanilla like scent he learned to cherish.

"I'm sorry Jae." It was only a whisper but Youngjae heard it and was about to question why Daehyun was sorry but he didn't get to utter a single syllable.

Daehyuns head wasn't resting on his shoulder anymore but it was a mere centimeters in front of the youngers face, those deep eyes declaring defeat. Youngjaes eyes closed only a second before Daehyuns thick lips met his own and warmth was spreading through both of their bodies, like a wave of fire that ignited at the touch of their lips. Daehyun didn't dare to move, his heart was beating out of his chest, skipping beats like it always would with Youngjae close. He moved against Youngjaes lips, softly, afraid to scare the younger away. He didn't and soon he could feel Youngjae kissing him back and the slim fingers tightened their grip on the back of his neck, pulling him closer. Daehyun didn't notice the few teardrops that escaped but he soon tasted the salty liquid in between their lips, mingling with the sweet, sweet taste of Youngjae. The younger tasted like strawberries, probably because of the lip balm their coordi noona put on, and Daehyun only deepened the kiss, loving the taste and it was dangerously driving him crazy. Time floated way too fast and soon they had to break the lip lock, in need for air but Daehyun followed Youngjaes lips as he pulled back, only hovering for a second until he straightened his back, Youngjae still in his arms.

"You can hit me if you want, scream at me, but never leave my arms" Daehyun whispered, savoring the sweet taste on his lips.

"I don't think there's a reason to hit you, but you did scare me a lot by saying you don't want me to be your friend anymore." The younger said, clinging onto Daehyuns shirt.

"Only because I want us to be more than that."

"Yeah?" Their words weren't more than mild whispers and Daehyun connected their lips once again but pulled back after a few short seconds.

"Be mine, Jae." The wind was getting stronger and their words nearly got carried away.

"I always was."

**Author's Note:**

> tbh not one of my best works


End file.
